On all of the days, I’m hoping for brightness for everyone. I hope that it’s not annoying. This is a newfound attitude for me, once prone to constant depression and veritable misery. I was a sad girl there for about thirty years, but I’m claiming the fact that I got better.
Because these positive feelings have been going on for quite a few years, I’m thinking it’s not just a manic episode, and that I might actually be recovering by changing my thought patterns. eating right, and treating my symptoms accurately. That’s kind of a crapshoot, because sometimes a well-intentioned medicine may not actually do the trick, and right now all of my eggs are in a basket, figuratively speaking. Actually, part of my healing was resigning those internal eggs to not this girl. I’m proactively not making babies, and thankful for it. I mean, it’s great when other people do that work, beautiful actually, but not for me. As my Mom so compassionately said, “You’re the baby. You’re the sick girl. You’ve got to figure out how to take care of yourself.” Thankfully she hasn’t unleashed any vitamins on me recently, and I’m only just tampering with water-soluble B vitamins currently. I know, man, take it easy.
Although my illness is that of a schizoaffective disorder, it’s mainly delusional thinking that I’ve grown out of, and chronic depression that is responding to my current antidepressant that I temper with an antipsychotic. I mean, I’ve struggled for this disposition for years, and I’m so thankful to be feeling fine. I still don’t think that the experiment of psych meds in the nineties and following decades was all for naught, and I tried out like all of those meds for all of you who might benefit from a test human. It was very therapeutic, and I’m okay health-wise currently as a result, although I do need to step up the exercise again.
Being a human is so complicated, that I pray that we all might regard one another compassionately. Honestly, friends, it is time to heal. We should probably all be okay unless the space aliens are mean like in the movies, or if the zombies do try to eat our brains. Fact and fantasy have gotten so out of control, it’s no surprise that we’re all taking psych meds to counter the storm. I promise not to write about my health for awhile now, but it is all that I’m currently obsessed with. But I am the baby, and I’m going to be a happy one if it doesn’t kill me. Keep on truckin’. Go read a book!
#Progress #Medicine #Relief #Transformation #Salvation #Healing #Future #Hope